We still have separate bathrooms for boys and girls…That statement highlights a rural school’s marquee as I head to a country general store.
Strangely, or maybe not, my first thought: What a bad sentence. It doesn’t convey what I know is intended. If I didn’t
We Still Have Separate Bathrooms for Boys and Girls
know what’s going on regarding trans folks choosing the bathroom that fits their identity, instead of their birth certificate, I’d be thinking, yeah, most places do have both male and female bathrooms. So what’s new? Is that really something that needs to be advertised in huge letters in front of your school? Doesn’t this facility have something better to announce? Like: Academic Excellence Valued Here! Or, Girl Basketball Champs 2016! Or even, Pancake Fund Raiser Friday night.
But I know what they’re getting at with their either bad or likely coded sentence. It irritates me on two levels: First—and I’m not proud of this, as a writer I get disturbed when sentences don’t accurately express the intended meaning—especially when I’m guilty of it. Secondly, and what’s more important, I got a snapshot of the kind of education those children are receiving in that school, both in their English classes and in the formation of their attitudes.
My stomach hurts.
I motor on through the gently rolling and bursting green wooded paradise. I love this land–it usually relaxes me, though not today. I also love rural general stores. They carry at least one of everything. If not everything, something else that could substitute, in a pinch, for what is needed. I’m doing spring repairs at our cabin, and I’m in search of wood glue. I find it and head for the cash register. In front of me is a man, I’d gauge in his early fifties, normal looking—whatever that means—talking to the store clerk. I don’t really hear her comments, but he’s going on, agitated about bathrooms. I figure the schoolyard sign has got folks talking—probably not about bad sentences. As I get closer and tune in to what he’s saying, I hear him preaching about who should be using which bathroom, and who should NOT, and the good old days when…I get his drift.
I think about a good friend of mine. She has a grandson in grade school who’s trans and all the problems that child and the parents are facing, and will face, as s/he grows up. Attitudes stick in hard-dry clay, for generations, especially out here in rural land. I stand there, horrified, with what feels like a rock in my stomach, hoping there aren’t any trans kids in this area. Wishful thinking.
The guy gets done with his purchase and turns and sees me behind him. I’m in my working jeans, T-shirt, and very short hair. He looks me up and down and says, like I had been part of the conversation: “And, if you want to pee in the girls bathroom, you’d better grow out your hair.
I say, “Around here, I’d rather use the woods.”
He looks at me like I’m from another world…I guess I am.
(To learn about my secret life, scroll down to: “My Dirty Little Secret.”)
what’s not to love about a nice little stroll in to the woods? 🙂
My comment above may seem flippant but it’s not, I just can’t “go there”, it upsets me, makes me anxious and angry and I fear for the future of this country and the people who call it home. Those who hate with such intensity used to understand that hate was not acceptable, but at the example of some of this countries “leaders” (a term I use very lightly here) they are emerging like termites from the wood pile and dance with delight as they hurt, insult, judge and ridicule people who mean them no harm but are simply different from them. It makes me sick….just makes me sick…
hahahaha, I guess I found a way to “go there”……..bathrooms of all things…what about issues like the treatment of this nations mentally ill or help fixing the faltering and inadequate education (teachers salaries), what about strengthening our health care system, fix what is dreadfully wrong (low income and seniors) with it and make it a right instead of a privilege (owning a gun is a freaking RIGHT, health care is a privilege…wtf) …what about working QUICKLY toward sustainable energy, what about an immigration policy that WORKS, what about freeing up some cash to spruce up our National Parks, and what about some more cash to CLEAN up our environment. What about some laws and legislation that would put contractors in JAIL when there is a nuclear waste leak and they turn don’t act, what about making sure our littlest ones have food every single day of the summer…..dear GOD, I could go on and on and on. I have always had a “list” and it grows and shortens, depending, but I never, never, never, EVER thought that “policing who uses which bathroom” would be on my list…….never, and it makes me so angry….ok, done now, over and out
It inspired me to think about the varieties in the world. This is a good article of wise thoughts and humors.
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